The Twelve Days of Christmas: Day 12

Jeremy's Status Message Proudly Presents The Twelve Days of Christmas:

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas,
My online anagram finder gave to me,
Mummers vend lewd rug trim,
Viper nipples peeing,
Penned alligators,
Sandal ending in ice,
Salami king might die,
Mass newsman viewings,
I see lying axe gas,
Diverging Felons,
Bald slicing furor,
Eh... Fresh Entrench?
Vetoed Wort Lust,
And I retained a paper garter.

Explanation: These are simply anagrams of the gifts on the twelve days of Christmas. Want to look them up yourself? Here are convenient links to the anagram finder. I got a great deal of amusement out of looking these up. Unfortunately, several of the most amusing anagrams were not publishable.* Note that if there are a lot of anagrams, the page may be slow to load:

Twelve drummers drumming
Eleven pipers piping
Ten lords a-leaping
Nine ladies dancing
Eight maids a-milking
Seven swans a-swimming
Six geese a-laying
Five golden rings
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtledoves
A partridge in a pear tree.

*Yes, I deemed "Viper nipples peeing" as publishable. I understand that. There are just some words I can't put on the blog, that's all.

This concludes the Twelve Days of Christmas on Jeremy's Status Message. We hope you had a joyous holiday season and look forward to seeing you in the new year!