Sametime is the instant messaging client we use at work. It allows users to edit a status message to indicate "I am active" or "Working from home" or "I am at a meeting." Long ago, I got bored with simple messages like that and started coming up with something creative every day instead. These are my daily status messages.
The fire truck can consume eight times its bodyweight.
Source: On Family Guy, this is a factoid Peter Griffin learned on a National Geographic special about firetrucks. The fire truck is a lone hunter which silently stalks its prey. Fire trucks launch into high-speed pursuit and take down their dinner using their deadly extension ladders. While feeding, they use their deep horns to ward off scavengers. This segment was so funny, I may spend most of Friday's Fourth of July parade giggling at the emergency vehicles.
Leaving it to YouTube to suck the funny (in this case the comedic timing) out of pretty much anything, here's the best clip I could find... at high speed.
Explanation: The other day I heard the word "genuflect" used and I realized that it has been a long time since I've heard it before. Frankly, I think the world is going to pot and people should really be showing more reverence than they do. I can't remember the last time I was bowed to. What's the deal, people? Do I not deserve the simple respect of being bowed to and called "Your Majesty" or "Your Highness"? How about "Your Holy Statusness"? I have a ring. You may kiss it if you wish. All I'm asking for is a little respect. Yeah baby. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Take care, TCB. Oh, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, a little respect. Sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, sock it to me, whoa babe, just a little bit. A little respect, just a little bit. I get tired just a little bit. Keep on trying just a little bit. You're running out of foolin' just a little bit. And I ain't lyin' just a little bit. The world would be more special if more people would genuflect once in a while. And by special I don't mean special like that Kleinemann boy down the street. More special like... like Special K, the cereal. Hey, what do they do with the regular K? And for that matter, what ever happend to Kaye Ballard? You know, if you said mallard and you had a cold, it would sound like ballard. This is life so go and have a ball. Because the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you may not be right for some. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have ... my opening statement. Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
Special Blog Bonus: Don't get it? Neither do I! Let's just have a good laugh and enjoy a Far Side about cows:
Factoid of the Day: Michael J. Fox's middle name is Andrew.
Source: I saw this on Inside the Actor's Studio and thought it was a neat fact.
Explanation: When Michael Andrew Fox joined the Screen Actor's Guild, there was already a Michael Fox. So, he went with "Michael J. Fox" because he thought Michael J. Pollard had a cool name. You can read all about this on Wikipedia.
Special Blog Bonus: The Family Guy parodies Back to the Future:
Last week I learned that candles and pan-ca-cakes can be the difference between a good day and a bad day.
Explanation: The short explanation is that when a 2-year-old mispronounces words, it's cute. My nephew is very excited about his sandals, which he calls "candles." And "pancakes" (which he also loves) happens to be one of the many words that he adds a syllable to when pronouncing. It was very cute to hear him ask the waitress for "pan-ca-cakes." When I do stuff like that, they just look at me like I'm crazy.
I think the most romantic song ever written was that one Elton John wrote for that guy on Who's the Boss.
Source: Taken from a quote by Phoebe on Friends.
Explanation: She goes on to sing "Hold me close, young Tony Danza." See, she messed up the lyrics to "Tiny Dancer" and thought it was about Tony Danza. This humor works because Tony Danza is just inherently funny. You know, like ducks, giant chickens, and Michael Jackson.
Special Blog Bonus: Here's a Family Guy clip about Tony Danza and Sylvester Stallone:
"You will need to know the difference between Friday and a fried egg. It's quite a simple difference, but an important one. Friday comes at the end of the week, whereas a fried egg comes out of a chicken. Like most things, of course, it isn't quite that simple. The fried egg isn't properly a fried egg until it's been put in a frying pan and fried. This is something you wouldn't do to a Friday, of course, though you might do it on a Friday. You can also fry eggs on a Thursday, if you like, or on a cooker. It's all rather complicated, but it makes a kind of sense if you think about it for a while."
Explanation: The author was just clarifying this point for children. Seemed like a good message, today being Good Friday and Sunday being Easter with the eggs and whatnot. Of course, if your Easter eggs are already hard-boiled, you should not even bother trying to fry them. If you're Jewish, you might have leftover hard-boiled eggs from Passover*, but you can't fry them, either. In fact, you probably don't want to eat them at all, since they're getting pretty old. If you're Canadian and you like your French fries, you might say "Good Fries, eh?" which is not to be confused with "Good Friday." Christians celebrate one as the day their Lord and Savior was crucified. The other is a nice side for a hamburger or fried fish accompanied by a bizarre Canadian tendency to end all questions with the sound "eh." Big difference there, too. Also, you have to be careful about the Ice Cube and Chris Tucker movie "Friday," especially if you liked it. I'll save that lesson for another day.
Special Blog Bonus: Speaking of Easter and chickens, here's a Family Guy clip:
The following is the scene that precedes that clip. Nothing to do with anything, but I think it's one of the best Family Guy scenes ever.
*It is also worth mentioning that the original Good Friday fell on Passover, while good fried eggs falling on Passover can pretty much ruin your seder, leading to a bad Friday, should Passover happen to fall on that day.
"No Peter, it's perfectly normal to siphon jet fuel from an active runway with the intention of flying a pickup truck."
Source: From the Airport '07 episode of The Family Guy
Explanation: Glen Quagmire loses his job as a pilot because his plane runs out of fuel and crashes in a field. He says this in an extremely sarcastic response to Peter (who put the plane's fuel in his pickup truck) when Peter says "Boy, Quagmire, I'm really sorry they fired you. I feel like this is partially my fault."
Special Blog Bonus: There is a lot of video for this episode on YouTube, but sadly, most of the clips are inappropriate for this blog. So, I give you Peter's dream of flying his pickup truck:
