Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Thrice the Blades, Thrice the Danger

See, the problem with a triple-blade razor is that now you get three razor nicks instead of one.

Explanation: In case you've been living under a rock for the past ten years, you've probably noticed that the number of blades offered on razors is increasing rapidly. Here's a nice little graph* of the number of blades per razor available to the general public since the invention of the safety razor in 1895.


As the number of blades per razor rapidly approaches infinity, a scary truth has remained unspoken. Sure, the multiple blades give you a smoother shave, but the multiple blades also mean multiple danger should you slip with the razor. The other morning I was half awake while shaving (as I usually am) and my hand slipped, giving me two very nice parallel slits in my cheek which bled profusely and forced me to spend the morning with toilet paper embarassingly wadded to my face. Still, I feel blessed knowing that my three-bladed Gilette did only two-thirds of the damage it was capable of. For those of you who think better graphically, here's what razor nicks look like for two, three, and four blade razors, plus a scary glimpse of what the future has in store for us. Beware!

*My graph is based on real live actual data. Gillette introduced the safety razor (one blade) in 1895, the Trac II (two blades) in 1971, and the Mach III (three blades) in 1998. Then Shick threw the Quattro (four blades) into the market in 2003, followed by Gillette's Fusion (five blades) in 2007.

6 comments:

Jack said...

Does this mean I should invest in companies producing first aid supplies rather than the Gilette googleplex razor (so many blades you look like a human sacrfice)?

Jeremy said...

I have already poured my life savings into gauze futures.

JCA said...

I bet you could rock a beard.

Jeremy said...

A nice beard would totally distract people from the fact that half of my head was missing.

Willie Y said...

How about a colorful hat to cover that carnage.

Peter said...

Go to badgerandblade.com, we're into Double Edge (classic single razor) shaving. Get rid of the bogus cartridges.