Monday, June 11, 2007

Have you Jimmed It Lately?

I totally Jimmed it in the Target parking lot last night.

Explanation: A certain friend of mine, let's call him "Jim," owns a car that was advertised with the slogan "wider is better." As a result of owning a slightly wider than usual car, he has a slightly wider than usual turn radius. When in a parking lot, in order to pull into a spot, anyone with a wide car (not just "Jim") must veer to the side opposite the desired spot in order to pull into said spot. This is a simple procedure and is usually executed without much difficulty.

When a second, more desirable spot becomes apparent on the OPPOSITE SIDE of the first spot after you have begun your approach, that's when trouble can arise. Suddenly, the wide car (which was in perfect position to park in the first spot) is now on the wrong side of the lane to pull into the new spot. The car must be quickly moved to the other side of the lane. When the driver cannot get the far enough over to get into the newer, better parking spot, he has "Jimmed it" and is now out of luck.

In the following diagram, the driver first saw the parking spot on his left. He veered the car to the right, preparing to park in it. As he approached, the driver saw the better spot on his right. He then pulled his car left to get into the better spot, only to find that he had been too far right and couldn't maneuver his car into the new spot. He Jimmed it.

Even more interesting is the case where the driver discovers an even better third spot on the left after the second spot:

In trying to park in the second spot, the driver has moved the car too far left for the third spot. He has now Jimmed it twice! See how many times you can Jim it!

EDITOR'S NOTE: Jimming it was discovered when in the car with "Jim," but it is not exclusive to "Jim." Admit it! You've done it too! And now you have a name for it. Consider it a public service provided to you by Jeremy's Status Message. You're welcome.


Jim said...

Wider is better...well, it is for some things, but they don't put this information in the commercial. I would like to thank Jeremy's Status Message for illustrating the plights of wide automobiles.

Every year, dozens of people succumb to "Jimming" it. They are regular people just like you. They are left with a feeling of shame and loss. It is hard for them to make it through their daily lives. But, all hope is not lost. With help and kindness from a person like you, we can cure these folks from their "Jimness". That's right, for a dollar a day, less than the price of a cup of coffee, you can save a life. We can cure "Jimming" it, one dollar at a time.

Please send your donations to The "Jimming" Fund. I am not only the president of The "Jimming" Fund, I am also a patient. Thank you and god bless.

The Good Jeremy said...

My life has also been touched by Jimming it. People just don't understand how difficult it is living with the embarassment of having to back up in order to get into a space. In fact, many of us live in denial, and go on to farther spaces instead...trying to hide our shame.

George Bush doesn't care about people with wide cars!!!