A Short Cultural Lesson

In case you're wondering, Bosnians don't differentiate between desks and tables.

Explanation: In almost 10 years of studying the Bosnian people*, this was one of the interesting facts I have discovered. They do not have words for "desk" and "table." They only have a single word that covers both. Imagine if you would, living in a world where the two were interchangeable. Oh the horror! Would Spamalot be nearly as funny if it featured the Knights of the Round Desk? Could we get our passwords reset faster at work if we called the Help Table? Would college have been nearly as fun with beer pong desks? (I think maybe more fun, actually) Yes, we have much to learn from this fascinating little civilization of theirs.

Stay tuned for future posts as we discuss other fascinating rituals of the Bosnian culture, including the 13-egg cake, running on ice, and of course, the rolling of the five pound plate across the gym floor.

*Admittedly, my sample size of the Bosnian people was 1, but it's a small country, so I'm thinking that's enough.

It's Gray Friday!

Drive-by body pierce.
Get crazy with the Cheese-Whiz!
Whatever that means.

Explanation: It's a special song lyrics version of Haiku Friday! Today's lead haiku was inspired by Loser by Beck. That song has some bizarre lyrics.

But that's not all!

From Zoot Suit Riot:
Who's your daddy? Yes I am!
They should tell Pedro.

Explanation: Here I am cleverly combining the lyrics of the Cherry Poppin' Daddies and a quote by former Boston Red Sox pitcher Pedro Martinez who proclaimed the following after a loss in 2004: "What can I say? I tip my hat and call the Yankees my daddy." Nowhere else but Jeremy's Status Message can you find such a clever blend of pop culture and sports. Nowhere! Don't even look elsewhere! Seriously, stop looking.

I am the highway.
I am not your rolling wheels.
Audioslave rocks.

Explanation: I am the Highway by Audioslave is just a good tune. That's all.

He's the space cowboy.
Some people call him Maurice.
I just call him Steve.

Explanation: I'm sure you all know this one. In Joker, by the Steve Miller Band, some people call him the space cowboy. Some call him the gangster of love. I prefer just using his first name.

Special Blog Bonus: Now, stepping away from the world of music, I have several random notes to mention:

1. Congratulations to my favorite Bosnian on the purchase of his house today! Stay tuned to find out if Enter Sandman is playing on the public address system as he walks in to close.
2. Special note for Barry Bonds: You can't spell "indicted" without "dic". Think about that.
3. Happy Gray Friday! I deem it so, because it's not quite Black Friday yet. Only 34 shopping days until Christmahanukkwanzakah! This means one important thing: next week NOBODY will be here to read my status messages. Such fun!

And finally, here's a trivia question to keep you occupied during the holiday week. What are the nine current MLB, NFL, NBA and NHL arenas or stadiums named for the teams that play in them? (No cheating!)

Bosnians and Broncos, Oh My!

From the archives:

There's three things you don't trust: mother nature, mother in-laws, and mother freaking Bosnians.

Source: This is a quote from The Italian Job, only in the movie they say "Ukrainians".

Explanation: You know, I don't even remember what possessed me to post this. I think I just liked the quote in the movie and I like ragging on Nihad. (Maybe I just like having a friend who's Bosnian, who knows?)

Special Blog Bonus: My favorite part about The Italian Job was that my Ford Bronco was in a significant chase scene, chasing the Mini Coopers. I was, of course, rooting for the bad guy, because my truck was totally cooler than the Minis.

Here's a clip in French, but without many words. Of course, the way it scrunches up the Bronco, it looks like a Mini Bronco...



Extra Special Blog Bonus: This is the important part: My old Ford Bronco was in The Italian Job with Edward Norton, who was in Fight Club with Brad Pitt, who was in Ocean's Eleven with Julia Roberts, who was in Flatliners with Kevin Bacon.

No Bosnians were harmed in the creation of this post.

Flags Of Our Lifting Partners

What do you get when you cross an Irish woman with a Bosnian?

Answer: A Cherylandnihadian!

In honor of the happy couple, we at Jeremy's Status Message have merged the flags of Bosnia and Ireland into the new improved flag of Cherylandnihadland!



Behold, the flag of the tiny one-bedroom republic:


Special Blog Bonus: In (belated) honor of Jim's 30th birthday last week, we present the new and improved flag of Jimania:


Note that the new flag is identical to the old flag, right down to the Syracuse/Mets colors, except that all of the interests and activities have been replaced by a person in a rocking chair.

Special Announcement!

Today is Nihad's Wedding Day! Congratulations to our favorite Bosnian! (And to Cheryl, who isn't Bosnian, but we like her anyway, except when she beats us in poker) Woo-hoo!!!

In honor of the special occasion: